Let me start off by saying that I am not fat. My heaviest weight is usually a goal weight for most people. I am petite, and that’s putting it mildly. If you ask me, I will say that I am 5 foot tall (I’m 4’10ish). I am talking about 130lbs on someone that is 4’10” with a small frame. Think about that. I couldn’t be more of an oompa loompa if I tried. I struggle with body issues and low self-esteem constantly and thought that if I lost weight, it would get better. But here’s the thing, I could never start it. I had no motivation other than self-loathing, which isn’t a really great reason to start making changes in your life. This year I had enough. I was SLOWLY making changes to eat healthier but I still wasn’t working out regularly. Cut to a week and a half ago. I put on my bridesmaids dress and couldn’t get it zipped all the way. I REPEAT, I COULDN’T GET IT ZIPPED. I was officially in panic mode. Do you know how I did it? I WANTED it. If you want it badly enough you WILL make necessary changes and that’s the hard truth. If you need any help I would definitely go to weightsnplates.com. It’s run by my friend Kevin and he’s a genius when it comes to this stuff. He’s also strict, which is what a lot of people need! Click HERE for the website!
These are my thoughts during my first week back to a healthier lifestyle.
Day 1- Wow. My heart is beating fast. Is it supposed to beat like that or am I about to have a heart attack? My thighs jiggle so much. I’m hungry. I want to read the captions on the TV but I don’t have my glasses on.
Day 2- I AM SO SORE. This cannot be natural. If I just work out for 15 minutes, is that acceptable? It literally hurts to breathe. Why does my body react like this to working out? Oh man, time to run. I hate running. It hurts my legs and makes my boobs jiggle.
Day 3- Oh, Backstreet Boys just came on my playlist. I miss them. Too bad they’re old and weird looking now. Except for Brian, I like him. I can’t breathe. I think I’m dying. Whew. Now what’s next? What does that machine do? Is it time to leave yet?
Day 4- THANK YOU BABY JESUS FOR REST DAY. I JUST WANT TO LIE HERE AND DIE.
Day 5- Everyone here has muscles. What will they think if they see me lifting 10 lbs weights? God, I am sweating so much. I wonder if people can smell me. This deodorant sucks, it’s totally not helping me out right now. This is why I don’t wear tank tops to the gym.
Day 6- Okay, it’s getting easier. I still hurt, but I feel great! All hail the power of Destinee. I did so many squats and core work today. I could probably lift a truck. I think I’ll just work out EVERYTHING and show the world how strong I am.
Day 7- Why did I think this was getting easier? ALL OF MY MUSCLES ARE SCREAMING THEIR DISAPPROVAL AT THIS WORKOUT. I’m just going to lie on this mat and pretend I’m stretching. I just want chicken tenders, French fries, and all the cheesecake in Charlotte.
I totally STILL think like that too, I just realized that my goal is bigger than my cravings. You know how all of that goes. If you ever want someone to help with motivation and affirmations, I’m your girl!
I'm Tory, the creator behind The Barmy Fox. My current loves